Thursday, February 7, 2008

Getting It Off My Chest

The evolution of boobs.

Highschool: Nothing much to speak of. Pretty flat. But relatively ok, because stomach was flat too.

College: started birth control and boobies grew a bit. Started drinking beer, and stomach did too.

Working world: covered boobies with suits and blouses. didn't think about them much.

Pregnancies- boobies HURT! Boobies doing weird things and leaking strange fluids! Am afraid of boobies.

Nursing- boobies become nonchalant soothing mechanism. Don't care who sees my boobies, including mailman when I inadvertently accept a package with boobie hanging out of nursing bra.

Post-kid boobies: Boobies now look like empty tube socks. Or chubby-fourth-grader-boy-scout boobs.

Diet boobies: Why is this the FIRST place I lose weight? Unfair. Grossly unfair.

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