Home again. For five more weeks. Today, our travel day, was completely exhausting. Usually, my kids are awesome travelers. They think changing planes is a treat-- they think baggage claim is fascinating, and lollipops used to buy me an hour or two of in-flight peace.
No more. Today's measly three hour flight exhausted the remnants of what patience I had left. It was a fun week, but an exhausting one. We started the trip with a Disney tour-de-force. Something about the Magic Kingdom brings out my dormant competitive spirit. I HAD to get the family to the park before it opened. We hightailed it to Fantasyland, and I did stop my running long enough to catch Lucy's face as she glimpsed the castle for the first time. It was like looking at Christmas morning. She spent the entire rest of the day asking when she could go inside. I thinks she had visions of birds making her a dress. A pink frilly one.
We went to Dumbo first, because Disney-nerds, statistically, Dumbo is THE ride for the under five set. Because it has a lever where your little one can control how high or low the elephant flies- they think it's the swizzle shit. For some bizarre reason, the planets aligned and there was NO ONE at Disneyland that day. In 30 minutes, we rode Dumbo, Peter Pan, the tea cups, Mr. Toad's Wild Ride and the carousel. It was insane. Seriously- if you ever want to avoid glimpsing the obese society that is the country of America- plan to visit Disney on a Wednesday in May. You can eat your churros in peace.
I won't bore you with any more details- like how cool the renovated Space Mountain is, or that you can do this whole "single rider/parent combination" that lets you skip some lines, but I will tell you not to take any two year olds to the 3d movie of "Honey I Shrunk the Kids" because you will want to rename it "Honey, I've Totally Freaked My Kid Out And She Now Needs Therapy."
Monday, May 19, 2008
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Trend Setting
Am in California. (Burglars Beware! New burglar alarm is set and working!) Looked at 14 houses yesterday, 13 today. Am struck by people's ability to fold their bathroom towels into unique shapes and marvel at how neat people's closets are. Have seen Pacific ocean. Have eaten at Taco Mesa. Have been on every Disneyland ride imaginable (Dumbo twice!).
In some ways, it feels like I never left California. Then, Matt and I have giggle fits by counting seven white Mercedes outside a Starbucks. One of the biggest blessings about moving to Houston was extricating ourselves from the materialistic lifestyle that pervades Southern California. We've only been here two days, and we have to remind ourselves not to buy back into that again. I'll show em'. Honda mini-vans can be cool too.
In some ways, it feels like I never left California. Then, Matt and I have giggle fits by counting seven white Mercedes outside a Starbucks. One of the biggest blessings about moving to Houston was extricating ourselves from the materialistic lifestyle that pervades Southern California. We've only been here two days, and we have to remind ourselves not to buy back into that again. I'll show em'. Honda mini-vans can be cool too.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
One Fish Two Fish Gay Fish Rude Fish
Matt was on call at the hospital last night, and hurried home this morning to rally us out for a Mothers Day breakfast. We didn't have reservations anywhere fancy, so we tried to hit our favorite breakfast spots. Our first stop was at Empire- a local eatery that makes a fierce omelette and mean bloody marys. It was packed. Filled to the gill with table vultures hovering around the outside patio- waiting to scoop up an empty seat. I didn't have the heart to battle with the vultures, and stood off to the side while I contemplated telling the family to try elsewhere. Standing next to me were two gay guys, feeling indignant that their morning spot had been invaded by suburbia. Listening to them kvetch- it reminded me of a funny story that happened at my cousin Martha's wedding.
Martha was getting married for the second time, but it was her soon-to-be husband's first marriage- so they did it to the umpteenth degree. White dress, formal ceremony, huge reception. It was at Shutters On the Beach in Santa Monica- a very la-di-da hotel frequented by celebrities, and famous for their patio cocktails at sunset. Martha's cocktail hour was on the terrace- overlooking the ocean. The bars were covered in fish nets, with little wooden fish smattered about as decoration. One of the fish was a perfect replica of the Hawaiian state fish- a Humuhumunukunukuapuaa.
Funny tidbit- we used to live in Hawaii, and would visit our east coast relatives. My Grandma used to ask me to say grace, and I would bow my head and tell everyone that this was an ancient Hawaiian prayer, and in my best minister voice would slowly say "Humuhumunukunukuapuaa Amen." When my brother got a salt water aquarium, he got himself a couple of these fish, and we would call them Humus for short. The Humu became the unofficial mascot of my family.
Anywhoo- back at the wedding, I was standing on line at the bar, waiting for a drink. I struck up a conversation with the guy in front of me. He was in his mid-twenties, good looking- and was at the wedding with his parents. He quickly told me how this was his first social event with his parents since he came out of the closet. He looked jubiliant, and slightly relieved. I had just started to congratulate him when my Dad came dancing up. Already a few cocktails to the ocean wind, my red faced Dad suddenly shouts and gestures to the wooden fish on the bar, "Hey Kristen! Did you know they had Humus at the wedding?" I sputtered my drink as the guy in front of me shoots my Dad the dirtiest look and slunks off to the corner. My Dad Rock Lobsters away to the buffet, completely unaware of the inadvertent social gaffe now infecting the wedding as I try and recover and hold up a wooden fish shouting "Humus! Humuhumunukunukuapuaa! Would you look at that!"
It's a good thing Martha's second wedding is still going strong. I don't think we'd be invited back for a third one.
Martha was getting married for the second time, but it was her soon-to-be husband's first marriage- so they did it to the umpteenth degree. White dress, formal ceremony, huge reception. It was at Shutters On the Beach in Santa Monica- a very la-di-da hotel frequented by celebrities, and famous for their patio cocktails at sunset. Martha's cocktail hour was on the terrace- overlooking the ocean. The bars were covered in fish nets, with little wooden fish smattered about as decoration. One of the fish was a perfect replica of the Hawaiian state fish- a Humuhumunukunukuapuaa.
Funny tidbit- we used to live in Hawaii, and would visit our east coast relatives. My Grandma used to ask me to say grace, and I would bow my head and tell everyone that this was an ancient Hawaiian prayer, and in my best minister voice would slowly say "Humuhumunukunukuapuaa Amen." When my brother got a salt water aquarium, he got himself a couple of these fish, and we would call them Humus for short. The Humu became the unofficial mascot of my family.
Anywhoo- back at the wedding, I was standing on line at the bar, waiting for a drink. I struck up a conversation with the guy in front of me. He was in his mid-twenties, good looking- and was at the wedding with his parents. He quickly told me how this was his first social event with his parents since he came out of the closet. He looked jubiliant, and slightly relieved. I had just started to congratulate him when my Dad came dancing up. Already a few cocktails to the ocean wind, my red faced Dad suddenly shouts and gestures to the wooden fish on the bar, "Hey Kristen! Did you know they had Humus at the wedding?" I sputtered my drink as the guy in front of me shoots my Dad the dirtiest look and slunks off to the corner. My Dad Rock Lobsters away to the buffet, completely unaware of the inadvertent social gaffe now infecting the wedding as I try and recover and hold up a wooden fish shouting "Humus! Humuhumunukunukuapuaa! Would you look at that!"
It's a good thing Martha's second wedding is still going strong. I don't think we'd be invited back for a third one.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
The Reflux
So my music experiment is working. My four year old now loves the Beach Boys, and the Go Gos. We were listening to Duran Duran today, and she asked me what the song was called. "Reflux, I mean Reflex," I replied. And then laughed until I almost wet my pants. Because in my head? I saw a geriatric Simon Le Bon, singing about his acid reflux problems.
The 80's were a really long time ago.
In other news, my expectations for tomorrow's mother's day festivities are now at an all time low. My husband, suddenly realizing he has nothing planned says " Please don't blame me! I never get to connect with the real world!" Sigh.
The 80's were a really long time ago.
In other news, my expectations for tomorrow's mother's day festivities are now at an all time low. My husband, suddenly realizing he has nothing planned says " Please don't blame me! I never get to connect with the real world!" Sigh.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Walking On Sunshine
Today was a great day. The kind of day I want to put in my back pocket and dust off on a day where nothing goes right. It started off with a mother's breakfast at school. I spent 30 minutes hanging out with Lucy, while she tried to hide her proud little grin as I sat next to her at the table and ogled over her eating blueberries. Then I headed upstairs.
Annie's class had a performance slated for 9am, and I didn't want to be late. We did a quick art project (covering pens with clay, and then baking them- very cool) and then the fun began. The kids played a cocoon game, and then sang an "I Love You" song to all of the moms. Then, the real fun started. Annie has talked about her "Vivaldi" dance at school for some time, but to see it in action is the epitome of cuteness. Each kid was assigned a part- there were a couple of adorable, (and patient! The CD player broke mid-performance) seeds that later transform into flowers. There were 2 suns that danced around the seeds, some whistling birds, a fierce rain cloud and lots of ribbons of rain. My little imp- she was a sunshine, and took the part very seriously. She was right on cue, and very intent with her rays of sunshine. Nevermind that she got into a tiff with the other sun, for the most part, she was very sunny. Seriously.
After all of this, the teachers presented us with books they have put together throughout the year. It's got dictations, stories, photographs and questions answered by the kids. It is, without a doubt, the coolest gift I have ever received.
After school, a friend invited us to their swanky swim club for the afternoon. This place was ridiculous- and oh so much fun. We had salads by the pool, and let the kids splash in the baby pool. Then, we enticed them to go down the water slide- which we did again, and again, and again. Suddenly realizing we were going to sit in traffic, we decided to stay for dinner. I took the kids to the ladies locker room, and we thoroughly abused the privileges of all of the free toiletries before making our way to the snack bar. The kids sat on barstools, in front of a glass window overlooking the basketball court. They cheered for each basket, and thoroughly enjoyed their dinner. I sat one table back, eating a crab cake salad and enjoying the company of a girlfriend. I dodged the traffic coming home by circumventing through town, and carried 2 little sleepy (and clean!) kids into bed. This day was a definite keeper.
Annie's class had a performance slated for 9am, and I didn't want to be late. We did a quick art project (covering pens with clay, and then baking them- very cool) and then the fun began. The kids played a cocoon game, and then sang an "I Love You" song to all of the moms. Then, the real fun started. Annie has talked about her "Vivaldi" dance at school for some time, but to see it in action is the epitome of cuteness. Each kid was assigned a part- there were a couple of adorable, (and patient! The CD player broke mid-performance) seeds that later transform into flowers. There were 2 suns that danced around the seeds, some whistling birds, a fierce rain cloud and lots of ribbons of rain. My little imp- she was a sunshine, and took the part very seriously. She was right on cue, and very intent with her rays of sunshine. Nevermind that she got into a tiff with the other sun, for the most part, she was very sunny. Seriously.
After all of this, the teachers presented us with books they have put together throughout the year. It's got dictations, stories, photographs and questions answered by the kids. It is, without a doubt, the coolest gift I have ever received.
After school, a friend invited us to their swanky swim club for the afternoon. This place was ridiculous- and oh so much fun. We had salads by the pool, and let the kids splash in the baby pool. Then, we enticed them to go down the water slide- which we did again, and again, and again. Suddenly realizing we were going to sit in traffic, we decided to stay for dinner. I took the kids to the ladies locker room, and we thoroughly abused the privileges of all of the free toiletries before making our way to the snack bar. The kids sat on barstools, in front of a glass window overlooking the basketball court. They cheered for each basket, and thoroughly enjoyed their dinner. I sat one table back, eating a crab cake salad and enjoying the company of a girlfriend. I dodged the traffic coming home by circumventing through town, and carried 2 little sleepy (and clean!) kids into bed. This day was a definite keeper.
Frigid
So in this long quest of finding a job and our new homeland, I discovered an important fact about myself. I really, really, really hate snow. With a passion. I dislike it. I abhor it. To try and communicate my relief that I will not have to wrangle my two little kittens into coats and find lost mittens fills me with such a sense of glee that I could do a jig right now.
There. I'm jigging. In my blue checked pajamas. How did I discover this? Way back when, during our puke-fest week of interviews - we left Tucson and headed to a small New England town outside Boston. They got a foot of snow while we were there. My husband was overjoyed. My four year old could not wait to make a snowman. My two year old looked up at me and started to blubber. Oh yes, this angel of my loins not only inherited my sweetness and mellowness (snicker, snicker) but she also hated the snow. She hated it so much she decided to express her displeasure by puking all over the hotel room.
When I woke up my husband to ask him to find a pharmacy, he looks out the window and says, "Are you crazy? I can't go out in that weather!" After silently conveying that I would no longer consider living in a place where we were afraid to go outside, my husband sighed and braved the elements.
For his patience, and his perseverance, and to reward him for moving me to a warm climate, I, Lollyblogger, solemnly do swear that within the next year and a half, I will learn to ski. And like it. I will do this to honor the man I love- the guy that works 18 hour days and happens to love to frolic in the snow. I will take him to Big Bear, and I will learn to like it. Let's just hope nobody pukes over this. Because I'm still not going to learn how to drive in it.
There. I'm jigging. In my blue checked pajamas. How did I discover this? Way back when, during our puke-fest week of interviews - we left Tucson and headed to a small New England town outside Boston. They got a foot of snow while we were there. My husband was overjoyed. My four year old could not wait to make a snowman. My two year old looked up at me and started to blubber. Oh yes, this angel of my loins not only inherited my sweetness and mellowness (snicker, snicker) but she also hated the snow. She hated it so much she decided to express her displeasure by puking all over the hotel room.
When I woke up my husband to ask him to find a pharmacy, he looks out the window and says, "Are you crazy? I can't go out in that weather!" After silently conveying that I would no longer consider living in a place where we were afraid to go outside, my husband sighed and braved the elements.
For his patience, and his perseverance, and to reward him for moving me to a warm climate, I, Lollyblogger, solemnly do swear that within the next year and a half, I will learn to ski. And like it. I will do this to honor the man I love- the guy that works 18 hour days and happens to love to frolic in the snow. I will take him to Big Bear, and I will learn to like it. Let's just hope nobody pukes over this. Because I'm still not going to learn how to drive in it.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Guess?
Somewhere in the world, someone got engaged this weekend. Someone found out they were having a baby. Someone drank a cocktail. Someone flirted. Someone got laid. Somewhere in the world, a family ate spaghetti, went to a Pump It Up birthday party and played lots of Disney Bingo. I'll leave it up to you to figure out which weekend I had....
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