My girlfriends always tease me that I am a wealth of useless information, kind of like Cliff Clavin from Cheers , and some have asked me to start a cooking blog- which if I ever get my digital camera working again I just may do. In the meantime, here are a few tips and tricks that keep me going and make life interesting.
1. Parmesan cheese rinds. Do NOT throw these away. EVER. They are the best secret weapon to making any pot of soup turn into a silky, smooth puddle of cheesy goodness. When we've got only a smidgen of cheese left, I pop the rind in a ziploc and toss it in my freezer. Whenever I make our version of Italian wedding soup (recipe coming soon) I do a little happy jig if I can throw one of these in with my stock. It will seriously change your life.
2. These jeans. I tried these on at Nordies a few weeks ago, and I swear- this two-legged wonder is responsible for making shopping fun again. Oh yeah- that and Weight Watchers, and my new Body Pump class- but seriously! My ass hasn't looked this good since well.... before kids. And you always have to buy one size smaller than you normally wear- so it's like instant ego gratification. Plus, they won't break the bank like some Sevens or Citizens will.
3. This mascara kicks some serious ass. I've always been a Greatlash girl, but one of my friends strong armed me into trying this, and I'm so glad I did. My eyelashes are ok, nothing to write home about- but this mascara (best brush ever
- you must try this) makes my eyelashes look all Betty-Boop like, without any racoon clumps to slut things up. I heart this.
So there you go- 3 useless pieces of information that do not further your life forward in any way. But if you start batting your well coated eyelashes at cheese rinds with your ass properly encased in a denim shrine- it may just make your day that much better. Especially after your kid walks off with your only set of car keys and you are already late for preschool and you have to take your husband's car and install carseats, until your little one fesses up with where they hid them and your head almost explodes. Not that I would know anything about that or anything. Sigh. I'm going to go look at some frozen cheese rinds now and get back to a happy place.
Friday, March 7, 2008
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Normal
Ever have one of those days where you feel like a dirty dishrag that someone is wringing dry? That's me. Today, I declared it a "home day." Since we're now getting 3 inches of rain in the next 2 hours- it was a good day to hunker down. I spent all morning putting stuff away- our house is so small that when one room explodes, the whole house looks like a tornado hit it. Suitcases were put away, medicines hidden for the next eruption, laundry done. It feels good to somewhat return to normal.
Ah normal. Normal is when my Lucy dumps a bag of tortilla chips on my bed. Normal is when my Annie falls asleep five minutes before we have to leave for a playdate. Normal is when no one wants to eat dinner, but everyone wants a snack. It's good to be home.
Ah normal. Normal is when my Lucy dumps a bag of tortilla chips on my bed. Normal is when my Annie falls asleep five minutes before we have to leave for a playdate. Normal is when no one wants to eat dinner, but everyone wants a snack. It's good to be home.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Home Sweet Home
I'm home. I'm home! I'm home! The last week was, simply put, ridiculous. Matt had 2 job interviews- in opposite ends of the country, and since we have no family in Houston- they both agreed to fly the kids out so we could check out the area. We began the week in the Southwest, and my parents drove out to meet us and do some babysitting so I could look at houses and such. Unfortunately, Annie caught a stomach bug the night before we left. Foolishly thinking it was only a 24 hour bug, we trudged forward- and now I'm going to spare everyone the gory details-(involving every bodily fluid imaginable) but it probably would have been best if we skipped the first leg and just got everyone well.
Good news! We received a full price offer on our house 4 days after putting it on the market. We are now in escrow, so please keep your fingers crossed that everything goes through. In the midst of spewing poo and vomit, this was truly, a blessing. Annie and I also met Justin Roberts last night- and he played our favorite song- D-O-G. Did you know he used to be in an indie-rock band? To support himself, he was a preschool Montessori teacher by day- and that's how he started writing songs for little ones.
We're getting rocking thunderstorms today with high winds, so I'm keeping my little ones home for a much needed jammie day. Thank you everyone for your well wishes and kind words- and I hope you guys miss this virus- it's a violent one!
Good news! We received a full price offer on our house 4 days after putting it on the market. We are now in escrow, so please keep your fingers crossed that everything goes through. In the midst of spewing poo and vomit, this was truly, a blessing. Annie and I also met Justin Roberts last night- and he played our favorite song- D-O-G. Did you know he used to be in an indie-rock band? To support himself, he was a preschool Montessori teacher by day- and that's how he started writing songs for little ones.
We're getting rocking thunderstorms today with high winds, so I'm keeping my little ones home for a much needed jammie day. Thank you everyone for your well wishes and kind words- and I hope you guys miss this virus- it's a violent one!
Friday, February 29, 2008
Confucious, Lying Bastard
Am out of town. Will give details later. Have been on six planes this week and am not finished yet. This week I have also seen:
* 4 year old puke in her own bed.
* 4 year old puke in her grandparents' car.
* Grandmother puke in sympathy to 4 year old puke.
* Car filled with vomit getting rear-ended.
* 4 year old crap her pants on an airplane.
* 2 year old puke on a plane.
* 2 year old continue to puke on a plane and her mother, every 30 minutes for 6 hours.
* 2 year old puke in a hotel bed.
* 2 year old puke in the other hotel bed.
* 2 year old spray poop all over hotel bathroom.
* Hotel housekeeper gag and try and hide tears.
Not only do I think I am banned from flying Southwest airlines ever again, but our current hotel room smells like the inside of an 80 year old's ass. Not a pretty picture. Pray for me people- this week ain't over yet.
* 4 year old puke in her own bed.
* 4 year old puke in her grandparents' car.
* Grandmother puke in sympathy to 4 year old puke.
* Car filled with vomit getting rear-ended.
* 4 year old crap her pants on an airplane.
* 2 year old puke on a plane.
* 2 year old continue to puke on a plane and her mother, every 30 minutes for 6 hours.
* 2 year old puke in a hotel bed.
* 2 year old puke in the other hotel bed.
* 2 year old spray poop all over hotel bathroom.
* Hotel housekeeper gag and try and hide tears.
Not only do I think I am banned from flying Southwest airlines ever again, but our current hotel room smells like the inside of an 80 year old's ass. Not a pretty picture. Pray for me people- this week ain't over yet.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Confucious Say....
Busy week here folks. Busy, busy, busy. I hope to have more to say soon, but at least tonight's dinner left us some good omens.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
I Wanna Be Sedated
Not a lot of new things happening here folks- just some stress, thrown in with a bit more stress, and a little more stress for added fun. We're in the process of selling one house, renting another one and researching another one to buy that just may be in one of 3 different states. (How's that for fun!) I don't have the kids on any lists for preschools, and this whole moving thing still seems surreal- until my beloved SD house officially hit the market today.
I'm trying to think of something witty and funny- and the best I can come up with is my nervous breakdown at the pediatrician's today. It's not witty, nor funny- but so typical of my life right now. Lucy woke up this morning complaining that "her ear hurt." Couple that with her fever on Monday and I thought we had a nice ear infection. I thought a quick trip to the doc was in order, and quickly secured a 3:15pm appointment.
There is something about a pediatrician's office that is like entering another dimension. Instead of preparing myself for the expected delay, and doing something smart like packing snacks, stickers and other various distractions- yours truly arrived 6 minutes late, with kids that barely had their shoes on and nothing but the gum in my purse to entertain 2 bored anklebiters for AN HOUR AND FIFTEEN MINUTES. The books in the waiting room are either covered in vomit, pooh or influenza, and they are so ripped and torn beyond understanding that Annie thinks Curious George is Cur-- eorg.
They do this bait and switch thing- where they make you wait outside until you are ready to stab your eye out with a pen left by some pharmaceutical rep and then, just when you think you can't take any more, the nurse appears, calls your name and ushers you to a waiting room. AND THEN YOU WAIT SOME MORE. Only this time, there aren't other kids to distract your kids with, or other parents to roll your eyes with, or poopie covered books to infect. I'm convinced they make you wait on purpose, and that they hide behind 2 way mirrors and get all snarky about your parenting skills.
"Look at this one, her kids barely have their shoes on and she looks like she's wearing pajamas."
"Yeah, she's now made them sing Old MacDonald for the fourteenth time."
"How many pieces of gum can that kid chew? That's ridiculous."
"OOH! She's stooped to a new low. She just threatened that four year old with shots. Look! She's pretending to call the nurse to give her shots! The audacity!"
And then, after the doctor pronounces that my Lucy doesn't have an ear infection, she looks quizzically at my response of "Oh Damn." Because, Dear Reader, I was truly hoping a course of antibiotics would make my girl sleep through the night once again. Instead, the doctor laughed and said "Sorry my dear, you've been played. By a two year old." Nice.
I'm trying to think of something witty and funny- and the best I can come up with is my nervous breakdown at the pediatrician's today. It's not witty, nor funny- but so typical of my life right now. Lucy woke up this morning complaining that "her ear hurt." Couple that with her fever on Monday and I thought we had a nice ear infection. I thought a quick trip to the doc was in order, and quickly secured a 3:15pm appointment.
There is something about a pediatrician's office that is like entering another dimension. Instead of preparing myself for the expected delay, and doing something smart like packing snacks, stickers and other various distractions- yours truly arrived 6 minutes late, with kids that barely had their shoes on and nothing but the gum in my purse to entertain 2 bored anklebiters for AN HOUR AND FIFTEEN MINUTES. The books in the waiting room are either covered in vomit, pooh or influenza, and they are so ripped and torn beyond understanding that Annie thinks Curious George is Cur-- eorg.
They do this bait and switch thing- where they make you wait outside until you are ready to stab your eye out with a pen left by some pharmaceutical rep and then, just when you think you can't take any more, the nurse appears, calls your name and ushers you to a waiting room. AND THEN YOU WAIT SOME MORE. Only this time, there aren't other kids to distract your kids with, or other parents to roll your eyes with, or poopie covered books to infect. I'm convinced they make you wait on purpose, and that they hide behind 2 way mirrors and get all snarky about your parenting skills.
"Look at this one, her kids barely have their shoes on and she looks like she's wearing pajamas."
"Yeah, she's now made them sing Old MacDonald for the fourteenth time."
"How many pieces of gum can that kid chew? That's ridiculous."
"OOH! She's stooped to a new low. She just threatened that four year old with shots. Look! She's pretending to call the nurse to give her shots! The audacity!"
And then, after the doctor pronounces that my Lucy doesn't have an ear infection, she looks quizzically at my response of "Oh Damn." Because, Dear Reader, I was truly hoping a course of antibiotics would make my girl sleep through the night once again. Instead, the doctor laughed and said "Sorry my dear, you've been played. By a two year old." Nice.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Talking Heads
Yesterday I ripped the heads off of about 60 of these and had myself a good ol' Southern good time. We went to our first crawfish boil! It was very cool. Our friends built a table on their deck, perfect for propping your beer up against, and it had a big ol' hole in the middle with a trashcan underneath. After the crawfish were given last rites with cayenne pepper, they went to the big old jacuzzi in the sky (along with some corn on the cob, mushrooms and kielbasa sausage). They eventually made their way on top of the hole-in-the-middle table where partygoers scurried around to rip their heads off and break off their tails and eat their yummy meat. Not a good day to be a crawfish, but a very good day to be a partygoer.
Some guy named Ward (who I later found out was from New Jersey) taught Matt and I the proper way to shell one. Rip their heads off, while snapping off their tails, then squeeze their puny legs together until the shell cracks and you can then remove the meat and the intestine in one swoop. Hungry, anyone? Actually, they taste really good. I couldn't get the hang of the ripping off the head thing, and everyone laughed when I would cover one up with a paper towel and quietly apologize before I ripped the f*&cker to shreds.
After a few beers, we cooerced Ward into sucking on one of the heads. It's a bit disturbing, but also entertaining. Matt had just returned from an interview in New Orleans, so perhaps I will be sucking my own crawfish heads in a bit. You never know.
Some guy named Ward (who I later found out was from New Jersey) taught Matt and I the proper way to shell one. Rip their heads off, while snapping off their tails, then squeeze their puny legs together until the shell cracks and you can then remove the meat and the intestine in one swoop. Hungry, anyone? Actually, they taste really good. I couldn't get the hang of the ripping off the head thing, and everyone laughed when I would cover one up with a paper towel and quietly apologize before I ripped the f*&cker to shreds.
After a few beers, we cooerced Ward into sucking on one of the heads. It's a bit disturbing, but also entertaining. Matt had just returned from an interview in New Orleans, so perhaps I will be sucking my own crawfish heads in a bit. You never know.
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